baby's first christmas

[stiles]

Stiles leaves Malia to rest, and the rest of the afternoon passes in a blur. He starts with cleaning up the remnants of their Christmas morning. There’s wrapping paper to throw away and toys to stack neatly under the tree and tiny clothes to add to the laundry. He moves quietly into their bedroom to tuck the check she had written him into his nightstand for safekeeping, feeling that same unease in the pit of his stomach the whole time it’s in his hand. But then there’s another task to do, something else to straighten up before their company arrives, and he’s quickly distracted.

Ava does him a solid and only starts to fuss once he’s finished putting the house back together. And then, she quickly consumes his afternoon. She’s hungry when she wakes up, demanding a bottle she’s not thrilled to put off until after he’s gotten her into a clean diaper. After the bottle, there’s a walk around the block a few times to take advantage of the mild December weather. There’s tummy time beside the tree as she stares mesmerized at the twinkle lights and the brightly colored ornaments. At some point, he has to change, and then he has to get Ava into the Christmas dress they had picked out for her a month ago. And before he knows it, most of the day has passed.

He’s just finishing putting on a tiny glittery shoe that she can’t even walk in when the doorbell rings. “I think that’s Uncle Scott,” he tells her with exaggerated excitement as he scoops her up from the changing table. She sucks on her tiny fist, seemingly unimpressed by the fact that they have guests - the antithesis to Scott’s excitement as soon as as Stiles opens the door. Scott immediately reaches for the baby, unable to get past her little plaid Christmas dress, while Nat offers him a bottle of wine and a sympathetic smile as she asks, “How’s Malia?”

Stiles feels a relief he hasn’t felt since Nat walked into the room the night of Ava’s birth as she walks into the house. She had become a lifeline that afternoon, answering his questions and offering suggestions. When she asks if she can use their stove to brew tea, he doesn’t hesitate to give her full reign, pointing at her as he mouths to Scott behind her back Don’t fuck this up. Scott, too, seems relieved.

Less than a half hour later, Noah and Melissa arrive, and it feels like the holidays he wants for Ava. There’s hugs and gifts piled under the tree and so much laughter, Stiles finds himself glancing towards their bedroom repeatedly, afraid they’ll wake Malia. When she does finally emerge just a few minutes later, she’s dressed, but her face is still paler than normal, her eyes still tired. Everyone wishes her a Merry Christmas in return. While his dad has the baby, Stiles is able to stand up from the couch, wrapping an arm around her waist and pulling her close. “Hey, how are you feeling?” he asks. “Nat brought you tea.”

[malia]

Later, when she has time to think about it, she’ll feel guilty that she slept almost the entire afternoon and left him alone to not only take care of the baby, but also the house and getting ready for the company they were going to be having over later that day. But right now, none of that registers to her. She just sees the happy sparkle in his eyes, and the way that Noah is cuddling Ava close to his chest while she sleeps against his shoulder, and the way that Scott has his hand resting tenderly on Nat’s leg. It all seems right and it seems good and she’s really glad that she didn’t agree with him when he suggested that they could cancel if she didn’t feel up to it.

She leans into Stiles as he joins her, wrapping an arm around her waist. She follows him further into the room, talking as quietly as she can. She doesn’t figure everyone there needs to know what’s been going on with her that Christmas Day.

“Not great,” She tells him honestly. She was still in pain, and she still has to think consciously every second about making sure that some part of her body isn’t deciding it wants to be a coyote without her permission. She looks at him with confusion when he mentions that Nat had brought her some tea, but she quickly agrees to drinking it as soon as he explains that she thinks it might help with her pain and even possibly with her shiftiness. She offers Nat a grateful smile as she settles down on the couch beside Melissa.

The tea does help, long enough for them to get through the pile of presents, mostly for Ava. She now officially had more toys and more clothes than Malia thinks she’s ever seen in her life, which was ironic considering how little she cared about making sure her baby was dressed in the cutest outfit every single day. Though, even she has to admit the little dress they’d picked out for her is precious on her. Noah loves his mug, the one she’d had made with pictures of Ava, and it really is a sweet afternoon that she will always remember.

But soon Ava starts to fuss, and as soon as she starts to fuss, Malia can feel herself begin to leak. And then she realizes that she hasn’t pumped since before the bath. The pain is back, and she is relieved when Stiles suggests that maybe she go into the bedroom with the baby so she can pump and feed Ava a bottle. Her head is starting to hurt from all of the concentration it takes to keep her coyote at bay, so she doesn’t hesitate to agree. She quickly retreats, the baby in her arms, after thanking everyone and not thinking to apologize about her escape. Stiles eventually brings her a bottle and she closes her eyes as she feeds the baby, her breast pump humming, trying to ignore the irony of the situation.

But she smiles, even through the pain and the frustration. It really had been an amazing Christmas. The best she can ever remember as she listens to the happy voices and laughter coming from the other room. If this was what the rest of their life was going to be like, she’s pretty damn happy about that thought.